Another Perspective on Homosexuality

With everything that has been going on with proposition 8 in California, there seems to be some strong opinions regarding the issue of homosexuality. In the last year I have taken an interest in the psychology surrounding this issue so I wanted to share some alternative views on this topic.

I am seeing a lot of biased absolutes coming from both sides of this argument. Many are saying that homosexuality is purely genetic while others are saying it is a plain and simple choice. What if it is neither. There are parts of who every person is that are inborn such as temperament and certain personality traits, however there is much more that is a result of our environment and our perception of various events in our lives. At birth all children regardless of gender are attached to their mothers. However, at the age of two or three males need to make a transfer to the same gender parent in order to develop normally. If no father is available another man can fill this role. If this shift is not made because a boy feels rejected (sensitive temperament) by the same sex parent or never finds a man to connect with, he can remain attached to his mother and may begin to identify with her feeling that he relates to women, expecially his mother, better than he does men. If this is not resolved then the young man will not make important bonds with same sex peers and feels rejected as if he does not belong to the world of men, however, there is an inborn knowledge that he is a man and wants those associations. This confusion becomes a fascination and intense study of the same sex as the boy tries to figure out "what's wrong with me?" During puberty when most boys become curious about the opposite sex these young men continue being fixated on the same gender and those feelings of inadequacy and longing to be accepted become sexualized. They are confused and conflicted by these feelings but because society tells them that they were born that way they finally decide that they have no choice at happiness unless they accept these feelings and live a homosexual lifestyle. Therefore this issues is neither choice nor purely genetic but a complicated series of unresolved trauma. If addressed this trauma can be resolved and the same gender attractions can be overcome. There is a huge population of people working to overcome this and many who have and live happy heterosexual lives.

There it is. I feel very strongly about this and I am beginning to feel that treatment of this issue, for those struggling with this but do not want to live a homosexual lifestyle, is the direction I would like to take my career in the future. I know that there are people who strongly disagree with this theory, however, I think it is important for people to be informed of other possibilities asside from what the liberal media presents. If you want to read a little more about this visit narth.com.

Family Outing

We decided to go on a Sunday afternoon drive today. The plan was to drive the Nebo loop, which starts in Payson and finishes in Nephi. It is a beautiful drive through the canyon. We started our drive and everything was going fine. We hit a little snow on the road but it was nothing that our trusty Subaru couldn't handle. We drove through the entire loop then to our utter disappointment, after 1.5 hours when we were only 2 miles from the end of the loop, we hit a locked forest service gate. Why it was closed I cannot tell you as there were people on the other side wanting to get through to our side. We had no choice but to turn back as we headed back we decided to take a side road back so we headed down Santaquin canyon. After a half our down that road we were once again forced to turn around as the road was blocked by an avalanche. Overall what should have taken us 2 hours ended up taking us 3.5 hours. Oh well. We were in no hurry and it was a really beautiful drive. Jude had such a good time he just sat on a rock and sang to the hills.

So Talented

Since I can, I now want to join those of you who blog about all the amazing things your babies do. I have to admit that I think Jude is rather talented and pretty amazing. Here are a few of his recent accomplishments:

Eating Bananas and looking pretty cute while doing it.

Pulling on things that hurt!

Standing

Camping! We were afraid he might be possessed. No worries though. We ahd him checked out and he's fine.

Helping dad in the yard. He didn't like it too much.

Giving people crusties. We told him it wasn't nice but he didn't care!

Looking like a general stud! Ignore the rainbow blanket, it detracts from the studliness of the picture.

I don;t know if this is an accomplishment or not but he is getting very good at acting like he doesn't know what you're talking about when he's getting into trouble.

Break dancing!

He is already typing 100 words per minute! His dad is feeling bad about his own typing skills.

He loves t make people feel good by saying "right on" and giving them knuckles.

Being a Very sad yet surprisingly convincing duck.

And he has incredible yoga skills.

So that's our kid. Pretty impressive huh? we will be sure to keep you all posted on upcoming accomplishments.

jude is 5 months old!

it's amazing how quickly time goes by! jude is 5 months old! he is still so amazing and makes me laugh all the time. it's amazing how this little guy has such a personality and is changing every day!

some accomplishments for jude
-jude is now rolling over not only from his tummy to back but his BACK TO TUMMY! the minute we put him on the floor he will roll over to his tummy. sometimes he'll roll on over to his back again and keep doing rolling till he's on the hardwood floor. other times (and most of the time) he'll just start to cry or get fussy cause he remembers that he doesn't like it on his tummy (i guess...)
-jude loves to play with his toys/hanging things from his bouncer and car seat. he loves to grab at them and make them rattle and put them in his mouth. it's so cute to watch and see him develop
-jude is taking rice cereal! bc jude is in like the 7th percentile for his weight (at 4 month check up he was 12.5 pounds and 25 inches), i figured that a little extra calories wouldn't hurt him. he seems to love it. now i just need to remember to do it
- i love it when jude follows me around and looks at me like--mom pick me up (he does want to be held a lot more now it seems)
- he is laughing and smiling TONS which i love!
- he puts his hands up and feels daddys' beard and my face.
-jude goes to bed between 8-9 and usually wakes up around 7!!
-i think jude is teething....bc he is getting much more fussy and likes his gums rubbed
-i love cuddling with jude and having jude fall asleep on my shoulder! specially bc he is becoming such a wiggle worm!
-as of now, he still loves the song "hey jude"

some things that we have done in the past few months
-jude and i suprised grammie (grandma E) and pupu and aunt haley. (we'll see if those names stick). it was so much fun to show off jude to all my friends in delaware! jude and i spent a week there at the end of march. we planned it this week bc haley's play (she was the lead in music man) was that weekend but it was postponed due to all the snow. mom/grammie was totally suprised! "how did this happen" was the quote of the night. debbie miller picked me up from the airport and helped me arrange mom to have work off. i went to mom's zumba class that she teaches (mom can shake it!!) we had a fo-family party and we had an amazing meal for cali's bday. it was so fun to be there!

-haley came out to utah a few days after i flew home to utah. haley and i went snowboarding up at sundance! haley did real good--for her first time. we spent 2 hrs going down the slope. then we came home. we then spent easter and conference up north with the nevilles! it's so fun to go up there and feel so welcomed there. plus the food was delicous! the rest of the week haley bounced back and forth between christian's house and our house. i think she had fun...bc she wants to come back and move here!

-danny has been working out in the yard like crazy! he has built a fire pit, a fence around our garden, ripped off our wood that was around are front porch, and has gotten a tree and bushes for the front yard. he also painted to door and shutters! it's looking so great! i dont know how he finds energy to do all this plus work/school.

-our lives schedule is as followed
---sunday=church and family time
---monday=danny work during day (i work every other monday night)
---tuesday=danny work during day and i work at night
---wednesday= danny work during day/school at night and i have young womens and recover from night shift
---thursday= danny work during day/school at night and i try to be house wife
---friday= danny work during day and i work at night
---saturday=i recover from work and danny works on the yard/house. then we have date night/hang out and recover from the week.
fheww, isn't life crazy. gotta do whatcha gotta do. danny will graduate in (i think) this jan which will be so so nice! its nice working nights bc i can wait up for him when he comes home late. sometimes danny will go to work late or come home eary bc his work is done and it's so fun to spend that extra little time with him.

-our future plans--going to gooblen valley in the middle of may. first camping trip with mr jude! hope it'll be fun! can't wait till we go!

well that's all for now folks....

pictures to come....

pic from the phone

PICTURES OF JUDE!!

11/29/09
Jude's Birthday

12/17/09

12/19/09

12/21/09

christmas
(almost one month old)

1/4/10

1/21/10


2/3/09
(2 months old)

2/12/10


2/17/10



2/24/10


2/26/10
(almost 3 months old)

3/4/10

3/5/10

3/11/10

3/14/10

3/17/10

3/21/10

(almost 4 months)

the worst blogger ever

so mr jude dude is 3 (almost 4) months old. it's amazing how time has flown by. since that time i have grown even more in love with my boys. danny is an amazing daddy! he's so cute with jude and i can tell jude loves him so much as he gives such big grins to him. just today he stopped eating and turned towards danny's voice with a big grin bc danny had just gotten home and was talking. jude has got a great personality and an amazing temperment.

mr jude sleeps at least 6 hrs straight at night (and has since he was a few days old). he has gone as long as 9 hrs sometimes! i had to wake him up and force him to eat for the first 6 weeks bc he wasn't waking up to eat. during the day he eats every 3 hrs. he is not a fussy baby. my idea of fussy appears to be nothing compared to others. there has only been a handful of times that i've actually thought--jude what's wrong.

he smiles tons now! he has a cute little laugh and is cooing/talking like crazy. he kicks and swings his arms when he's excited and has now found his hands. he likes to bring both of his hands to his mouth and "contemplate". he rolled over from tummy to back like 2 months ago but seems to have forgotten bc he doesn't do it as often now. he doesn't really like baths (sad for me) and diffenently does not like showers. he's not a huge fan of the binky but is a fan of his fist/thumb. he loves his bouncer and will fall asleep in it with an aggressive bounce. he loves to stand tall, fly like superman, play patty cake, and absolutly loves it when we sing. he's grabbing at toys now as well. he's just amazing and i just love him.

his 2 month check up--
he was 23 inches long (75%) and weighed 10 pounds 6 ounces (35%). he got his shots (which he did not like) and he rolled over for the doctor.

some highlights of the past 3 months
-jude was blessed by his daddy on jan 8th. we had his blessing at our house bc it was stake conference that week for our ward. my cousing got married the 7th and my mom did the wedding cake. so jude was blessed with tons of family at our house. not only was my daddy, mom, and sister there from delaware, but tons of my family that live in utah was here PLUS family that were in town for my cousins wedding. the house was packed with all family! the food was delicious! it was a beautiful day, showing off jude and seeing family support us. danny did a great job and a beautiful prayer. i was sure proud!

-i started back at work. i now work nights. 12 hour shifts from 6pm to 6am. it's really not that bad, i work 2 shifts one week and 3 shifts the next week for the minimal hours for full time so we can get cheaper benefits. the worst part is recovering the next day and leaving the family. i really enjoy beign social with the patients and other co-workers. i'm going to cross train to pediatrics which i'm really excited about.

-we went to the joan jett concert. she winked at me. it was amazing. i went with danny and his sister and mom! it was during sundance film festival and we also got to see on stage kirsten stewart and dakota fanning for their new movie the runaways.

-danny and i went on a romantic get away for my birthday weekend! it was sooooo much fun and so needed! we went snowboarding at sundance which was so much fun but i am so out of shape. plus at sundance it was icy and slushy. THEN we went to the roof in salt lake city! it was sooo beatiful and romantic. the food was amazing but i was so tired and was sad that i couldn't eat tons at the gourmet buffet. we THEN spent the night at anniversary inn!! it was a blast and i'll just leave it at that. christian and sarah were amazing and watched jude and capo! i was ever so greatful. it was amazing!

besides that, danny is still loving work and going to double school. we are so packed in our schedule. he will graduate around jan and we are excited!

well i've gotta go--update pics latter.

Jude is 6 weeks old!

squirrel boy--clothes don't fit
3 generation--bruce, danny and jude
proud papa
caldwell family after jude was born

very pregnant, hours before we went to the hospital. this is our little hallway where jude stays.

under bili lights, jude was juandice